Spent

You made me to dance, to fly, to sing

You made me to laugh and cry and scream

You made me to sigh, sleep, work

You made me to play, grow and search

Why do I spend my time trying to lift the weight I was never meant to carry?

Why do I use my energy trying to fix all the “problems” You never told me?

Why do I try to understand that which takes me from Your present peace?

Why do I keep shrinking smaller so as to not exist in my proper space?

My life is meant to be at rest in Someone in love with me

Where I am home

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Don’t Abandon

Burning blue eyes

You see through to people’s hearts

You perceive souls with your own

You feel deeply while you see

Their pain, fear and ignorance

You sense the arrogance, confusion and rejection

And you still fall under the weight of the world

On your shoulders as if it’s yours to carry and heal

When your own feelings are too much to bear alone

 

You are powerful and strong

You have so much courage and bravery

But you have spent so much of it

Living and surviving, keeping your life full

And your heart beating, lungs heaving

You are running yourself ragged

When there are none to boost you up

None to fill your wings with air

When you suffocate from burdens

 

Your power is shining through

When you are empty and yet still breathing

You have such strength to carry on

When you feel small and weak

You have such courage to walk

When you feel you have none to walk with

You are brave, so brave

When you stand again after being beaten down

And while you feel alone overwhelming you

I am here

I see you

You cannot be forgotten

Broken

You are convinced I am broken. I’m not. I know it in my heart. I’m not broken because God calls me His child. You calling me broken does not make me any more broken than we all are. We’re actually all already broken because we’re human. You declaring I’m broken is just covering up the fact that you’re broken and you know it.  You’re just trying to hide it and ignore it. It’s not something you can change. You’re just running from it. I’m not anymore. We can acknowledge it. And accept it. We don’t have to be afraid.

I am not broken in desperate need of rebuilding. I’m already whole. I’m not a problem to be solved. I don’t need to be fixed. I’m a soul that wants to be known and loved. Don’t treat me like an issue that needs a solution. I see right through you. I know exactly what you’re trying to do. Don’t treat me like a mistake that needs correction.

Why do you break me so that I have to put myself back together again? Why am I guilty until proven innocent to you? Why am I dirty in your eyes? Explaining to you why I’m not these things is always an uphill battle I just don’t have the strength for. I can’t bear the burdens I put on myself, let alone the ones you put on me that you are never willing to carry. The burdens swamp around me and begin to get inside of me. They wrap around my heart and start to constrict its beating. Then they reach around my lungs and keep me from breathing. But when I get exhausted from carrying them, I cut it all off and burn it with the small strength I have left. I don’t deserve to carry it all.  I was meant to be free. I was made to fly.