Break the Silent Words

Why can’t I think of words for how I feel

Am I wrong for what emotions fill me

I certainly don’t ask for all these

I can’t describe the feelings turning around inside

The tiny words don’t explain the big overwhelm

Maybe that’s because I’m more than words

I can’t be held within an explanation

I am known by more than a description

My story is more than sentences

I am not held down in a box of labels

I am not easily figured out

Maybe I am complex and unsimple

Just waiting to be heard

An Honest Plea

I long for rest

I desire more relief from the things that hold me down, break me, the things imposed on me by others, the things I learned from religion, the things I thought I had to be and do to make You happy

I long for continued deliverance from the lies, for more clarity and wisdom in You

I thirst to know more of Your grace that I may learn to live it out more

I want to believe Your love more, that I may be released from fear more and more

I hunger to feel your comforting presence more often, that I may learn to feel loneliness and not despair because of it

I long to be known, loved, understood, listened to, liked, and appreciated

I want to be wanted

So I come to you

I ask You to get me through another day

To comfort me when I’m lonely

To keep me safe when I’m overwhelmed

To carry me when I hurt

To lift me when I am so burdened

To hold me when I cry

Would You give me the strength to face the day

To watch others find their way

To feel darkness and pain

And wait

To keep taking care of myself

To hold onto the belief that I am worthy of love

To keep the faith that who I am is beautiful

To be for another moment and allow air to fill my lungs and become breath

Give me the strength to know I’m enough

To hold onto the hope that there is a place for me

To believe that I am lovable even though I am not perfect

That I am not alone

Help me to have Your power to stand up for myself

To be brave when I’m afraid

Fill me with the knowledge of Your immeasurable love for me

And Your divine creation of me

And Your plan of my life

I want to believe I’m safe in You even if I may not always feel like it

Abba I belong to you